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Praise be to Allaah.

 

With regard to men wearing gold, whether it is a ring or anything else, it is not permissible under any circumstances, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) forbade gold for the males of this ummah. He saw a man wearing a ring of gold and he (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) took if from his hand and said, “Would any one of you take a coal from the fire and hold it in his hand?” (Narrated by Muslim, al-Libaas wa’l-Zeenah, 3897). So it is not permissible for the Muslim male to wear a gold ring. But with regard to rings of silver or any other kind of metal, it is permissible for men to wear them even if they are precious metals.

With regard to the wedding ring, which is worn on the occasion of marriage, this is not one of the customs of the Muslims. If it is believed that it generates love between the spouses, and that taking it off and not wearing it will have an effect on the marital relationship, then this is regarded as a form of shirk and is a kind of jaahili belief. Based on the above, it is not permissible to wear a wedding ring under any circumstances.

Firstly, because it is an imitation of those who are no good; it is a custom that has come to the Muslims from the non-Muslims.

Secondly, if that is accompanied by the belief that it has an effect on the marital relationship, then this is a kind of shirk. Laa hawla wa laa quwwata illa Billaah (there is no power and no strength except with Allaah).

(From a fatwa issued by Shaykh Saalih al-Fawzaan).

Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen was asked about the ruling on wearing engagement rings. He said: The engagement ring is a kind of ring, and there is nothing wrong with rings in principle, unless that is accompanied by some belief, as some people do when the man writes his name on the ring that he gives to his fiancée, and she writes her name on the ring that she gives to him, believing that this will create strong bonds between the couple. In this case, this ring is haraam, because it is an attachment to something for which there is no basis in Islam and which makes no sense. Similarly, with regard to the engagement ring, it is not permissible to the man to put it on his fiancée’s hand, because she is not his wife yet and she is still a stranger (non-mahram) to him, because she is not his wife until after the marriage contract has been done.

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There is no sin on you if you sit with your fiancée in order to work out some details of the wedding, but you should not be alone with her, so one of her mahrams or her mother should sit with you, and there is nothing wrong with that in sha Allaah.

Shaykh Ibn Baaz (may Allaah have mercy on him) was asked the following question in Majmoo’ al-Fataawa (20/429):

I love a girl very much and she also loves me. I have seen her only once, and I started to speak to her by phone within respectable limits, and we agreed to get married. Most of my conversations with her have to do with married life and the mutual understanding between spouses that is necessary, and how a wife should treat her husband and look after his house, and so on. Is it permissible for me to speak to her if she calls me, or is that not permissible?

He (may Allaah have mercy on him) replied:

If a man wants to propose marriage to a woman, it is permissible for him to speak with her and look at her without being alone. When a man came to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) to ask his opinion, he said: “Have you looked at her?” He said: No. He said: “Go and look at her.” And he said: “When one of you proposes marriage to a woman, if he can look at that which will encourage him to go ahead and marry her, let him do so.” Narrated by Abu Dawood (1783).

Looking is more serious than speaking, so if the conversation has to do with the marriage and where they will live, and how married life should be so that he will know whether she is familiar with these issues, there is nothing wrong with that if he wants to propose marriage to her. But if he does not want to propose marriage to her, then he has no right to do that. So long as he wants to marry her, it is permissible for him to talk to her about the engagement and about that which will encourage him to marry her, and she may do likewise, so long as they are not alone together; rather it should be done from a distance and in the presence of her father, brother or mother etc. End quote.

Praise be to Allaah.

 

It is not permissible except in a case where both parties trust one another and where the parents agree to the marriage and have no objections. In this case it is acceptable for them to speak to one another in a normal manner, discussing matters of life that concern them. But if they know that their parents do not agree to that, then it is not permissible for them to speak to one another in this case.

Shaykh ‘Abd-Allaah ibn Jibreen.

The fiancée is still a non-mahram woman and speaking to her is still speaking to a non-mahram woman, so it must be done properly and only as much as is necessary, such as agreeing on specific matters to do with after they get married. Attention must also be paid to the following:

1 – It must be done with the agreement of the woman’s guardian and with no objection on his part to the marriage.

2 – The talk should not involve anything that may provoke desire or cause temptation.

3 – There should be no other way of telling her what he wants to say, such as through his sister or her brother, or by letter.

4 – It should not go beyond what is essential.

And Allaah is the Source of strength.

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